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A caveman's rules for success



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Old 01-11-2017, 07:08 PM   #1
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Default A caveman's rules for success

Rule #1: Don't mess with anything bigger and stronger than you. It may kill you.

Rule #2: If you don't know what it is, don't touch it. It may kill you. It may also belong to someone or something that is bigger and stronger than you (see rule #1).

Rule #3: If you make a mistake and live through it, then learn from it. The next time it may kill you.

Rule #4: If you see someone else make a mistake, then learn from it. Otherwise it may kill you.

Rule #5: A club and a spear are essential tools. They may help you avoid dying if you fail to apply rules 1-4. They will also help you find food; and keep it afterward.

Rule #6: Conversations are unnecessary. They distract you and scare the food away.

Rule #7: No one's going to take care of you. Unless you are a baby, if you don't work then you don't eat. Cavemen aren't known for being overly generous with things they worked hard for. Contribute or starve.

Rule #8: Things won't always work out. Bad things can (and do) happen. You need to be prepared to overcome, adapt, migrate, or die.

Rule #9: Plan for the immediate future. Make sure you have the tools, food, and supplies you will need to get through foreseeable hardships.

Rule #10: You must be able to think on your feet, and react quickly and effectively. Plans are nice, but often times they fail to come together. At such times, if you hesitate, you often die.



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Old 01-11-2017, 07:13 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mr_flintstone View Post
Rule #1: Don't mess with anything bigger and stronger than you. It may kill you.

Rule #2: If you don't know what it is, don't touch it. It may kill you. It may also belong to someone or something that is bigger and stronger than you (see rule #1).

Rule #3: If you make a mistake and live through it, then learn from it. The next time it may kill you.

Rule #4: If you see someone else make a mistake, then learn from it. Otherwise it may kill you.

Rule #5: A club and a spear are essential tools. They may help you avoid dying if you fail to apply rules 1-4. They will also help you find food; and keep it afterward.

Rule #6: Conversations are unnecessary. They distract you and scare the food away.

Rule #7: No one's going to take care of you. Unless you are a baby, if you don't work then you don't eat. Cavemen aren't known for being overly generous with things they worked hard for. Contribute or starve.

Rule #8: Things won't always work out. Bad things can (and do) happen. You need to be prepared to overcome, adapt, migrate, or die.

Rule #9: Plan for the immediate future. Make sure you have the tools, food, and supplies you will need to get through foreseeable hardships.

Rule #10: You must be able to think on your feet, and react quickly and effectively. Plans are nice, but often times they fail to come together. At such times, if you hesitate, you often die.
Methinks this is adaptable for Cave-Moles as well...



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Old 01-11-2017, 07:28 PM   #3
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This reminded me of some of the chief's "rules" for haz mat incidents involving rail cars.

If the air tastes or smells funny, I'm too close. (Or I probably just sh*t myelf.)

If I can clearly read the labels on the tanker with my binoculars, I'm too close.

If I close one eye, hold up my thumb, try to cover the spill sight, and I can still see it, I'm too close.

For future reference; playing rock, paper, scissors to decide who is going to taste test it, is now forbidden.

No matter when the incident occurs, my shift ended 15 minutes ago, good luck.
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Old 01-11-2017, 08:43 PM   #4
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This reminded me of some of the chief's "rules" for haz mat incidents involving rail cars.

If the air tastes or smells funny, I'm too close. (Or I probably just sh*t myelf.)

If I can clearly read the labels on the tanker with my binoculars, I'm too close.

If I close one eye, hold up my thumb, try to cover the spill sight, and I can still see it, I'm too close.

For future reference; playing rock, paper, scissors to decide who is going to taste test it, is now forbidden.

No matter when the incident occurs, my shift ended 15 minutes ago, good luck.
The Chief's shift, correct?
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Old 01-11-2017, 08:49 PM   #5
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I was one of the haz mat techs. Even if I was off shift, I got toned out.
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Old 01-12-2017, 05:55 PM   #6
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Methinks this is adaptable for Cave-Moles as well...

What other kind are there? Space-moles? Jungle-moles? Free-range-moles?

Curious.
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Old 01-12-2017, 05:57 PM   #7
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Mexican To-moles? With chile?
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Old 01-12-2017, 06:11 PM   #8
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Guaca-mole?

I could do this all day...



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