Hipoint Firearms Forums > Other Topics of Interest > HPFF Comedy > Garden snakes can be dangerous



Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 11-22-2010, 06:53 PM   #1
adam
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Michigan, USA
Posts: 933
Send a message via Yahoo to adam
Default Garden snakes can be dangerous

[size=18pt]Garden snakes can be dangerous...[/size]

Snakes also known as Garter Snakes (Thamnophissirtalis) can be dangerous. Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes. Here's why.

A couple in Sweetwater, Texas, had a lot of potted plants. During a recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of them indoors to protect them from a possible freeze.

It turned out that a little green garden grass snake was hidden in one of the plants. When it had warmed up, it slithered out and the wife saw it go under the sofa.

She let out a very loud scream.

The husband (who was taking a shower) ran out into the living room naked to see what the problem was. She told him there was a snake under the sofa.

He got down on the floor on his hands and knees to look for it. About that time the family dog came and cold-nosed him on the behind. He thought the snake had bitten him, so he screamed and fell over on the floor.

His wife thought he had had a heart attack, so she covered him up, told him to lie still and called an ambulance.

The attendants rushed in, would not listen to his protests, loaded him on the stretcher, and started carrying him out.

About that time, the snake came out from under the sofa and the Emergency Medical Technician saw it and dropped his end of the stretcher. That's when the man broke his leg and why he is still in the hospital.

The wife still had the problem of the snake in the house, so she called on a neighbor who volunteered to capture the snake. He armed himself with a rolled-up newspaper and began poking under the couch.. Soon he decided it was gone and told the woman, who sat down on the sofa in relief.

But while relaxing, her hand dangled in between the cushions, where she felt the snake wriggling around. She screamed and fainted, the snake rushed back under the sofa.

The neighbor man, seeing her lying there passed out, tried to use CPR to revive her.

The neighbor's wife, who had just returned from shopping at the grocery store, saw her husband's mouth on the woman's mouth and slammed her husband in the back of the head with a bag of canned goods, knocking him out and cutting his scalp to a point where it needed stitches.

The noise woke the woman from her dead faint and she saw her neighbor lying on the floor with his wife bending over him, so she assumed that the snake had bitten him. She went to the kitchen and got a small bottle of whiskey, and began pouring it down the man's throat.

By now, the police had arrived.

They saw the unconscious man, smelled the whiskey, and assumed that a drunken fight had occurred. They were about to arrest them all, when the women tried to explain how it all happened over a little garden snake!

The police called an ambulance, which took away the neighbor and his sobbing wife.

Now, the little snake again crawled out from under the sofa and one of the policemen drew his gun and fired at it. He missed the snake and hit the leg of the end table. The table fell over, the lamp on it shattered and, as the bulb broke, it started a fire in the drapes.

The other policeman tried to beat out the flames, and fell through the window into the yard on top of the family dog who, startled, jumped out and raced into the street, where an oncoming car swerved to avoid it and smashed into the parked police car.

Meanwhile, neighbors saw the burning drapes and called in the fire department. The firemen had started raising the fire ladder when they were halfway down the street. The rising ladder tore out the overhead wires, put out the power, and disconnected the telephones in a ten-square city block area (but they did get the house fire out).

Time passed! Both men were discharged from the hospital, the house was repaired, the dog came home, the police acquired a new car and all was right with their world.

A while later as the couple were watching TV and the weatherman announced a cold snap for that night. The wife asked her husband if he thought they should bring in their plants for the night.

And that's when he shot her


__________________
GOD, GUNS AND GUTS MADE AMERICA LETS KEEP ALL THREE!!!
adam is offline  
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 11-22-2010, 07:20 PM   #2
Corelogik
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 2,928
Liked 1 Times on 1 Posts

Default Re: Garden snakes can be dangerous

ROFLMFAO


Corelogik is offline  
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 11-24-2010, 01:31 AM   #3
JIMMIE10
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: TULSA OK
Posts: 30
Likes Given: 1

Default Re: Garden snakes can be dangerous

LOL I like that story I can see than
JIMMIE10 is offline  
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 11-27-2010, 03:14 PM   #4
yenner
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Ohio
Posts: 427
Default Re: Garden snakes can be dangerous

TL;DR
yenner is offline  
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 12-04-2010, 12:58 AM   #5
jwash3rd
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: NW Illinois
Posts: 329
Default Re: Garden snakes can be dangerous

They should have kept the snake for a pet and named it "Lucky."


jwash3rd is offline  
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
22LR for snakes? lcback Caliber Zone 32 08-19-2012 06:12 AM
Snakes on the move panamared1951 Lounge 4 04-24-2011 07:51 PM
Garden is Go devilsjackpot Vintage Topic Archive (Oct - 2009) 44 05-30-2009 01:48 AM
Bore Snakes Sagatar Vintage Topic Archive (Sept - 2009) 24 02-20-2009 01:13 AM
Bore-Snakes and foaming cleaning supplies? AndrewST Vintage Topic Archive (Sept - 2009) 11 03-21-2008 08:45 PM

Hi-Point and other models are copyrighted and trademarked to Hi-Point Firearms and MKS Supply. Hipointfirearmsforum.com is not in any way associated with Hi-Point Firearms or MKS Supply LLC