Another Joke

Discussion in 'Vintage Topic Archive (Sept - 2009)' started by CG-49 Plankowner, Mar 10, 2008.

  1. My dad emailed this to me. If you've seen it before, okay.

    THE PASTOR'S ASS

    The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.

    The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again.

    The local paper read:

    PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT

    The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.

    The next day, the local paper headline read:

    BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS

    That was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey.
    The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.

    The local paper, hearing the news, posted the following headline the next day:

    NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN

    The Bishop fainted! He then informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10.

    The next day the paper read:

    NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10

    This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.

    THE NEXT DAY THE HEADLINES READ:

    NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE

    The Bishop was buried the next day.

    The moral of the story is....being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery.....even shorten your life!

    So be yourself and enjoy life. Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll be a lot happier and live longer!!

    Have a nice day!!! :wink:
     

  2. Strangerous

    Strangerous Member

    4,752
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    Ha! That's a good one to NOT tell a pastor!
     
  3. I got that in an E-mail from my dad about 3 days ago... Good stuff.
     
  4. 69burbon

    69burbon Well-Known Member

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    Thanks I needed that. Been a long day! :D
     
  5. :D Good one.

    Kind of sorta in the same vein:

    Three Italian nuns die and go to heaven.

    At the Pearly Gates, they are met by St. Peter. He says, 'Sisters, you all led such exemplary lives that the Lord is granting you six months to go back to earth and be anyone you wish to be

    The first nun says, 'I want to be Sophia Loren;'

    And *poof* she's gone.

    The second says, 'I want to be Madonna and *poof* she's gone.

    The third says, 'I want to be Sara Pipalini.'

    St. Peter looks perplexed. 'Who?' he asks.

    'Sara Pipalini,' replies the nun.

    St. Peter shakes his head and says, 'I'm sorry, but that name just doesn't ring a bell.'

    The nun then takes a newspaper out of her habit and hands it to St. Peter.

    St. Peter reads the paper and starts laughing. He hands it back to her and says.

    'No sister, the paper says it was the ' Sahara Pipeline' that was laid by 1,400 men in 6 months.'

    If you laugh, you are going straight to hell!
    :D
     
  6. Fire and Brimstone, here I come... :D
     
  7. elguapo

    elguapo Guest

    Heck , I am already here.
    Good joke!