grow a pair

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by tallbump, May 19, 2014.

  1. tallbump

    tallbump Supporting Member

    http://www.foxnews.com/us/2014/05/17/california-mayor-sparks-outrage-by-telling-bullying-victims-to-grow-pair/.

    California mayor sparks outrage by telling bullying victims to 'grow a pair'


     
  2. ajole

    ajole Supporting Member

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    Grow a pair, and get a gun.

    The American dream in a nutshell.:cool:

    Just watched the old Gregory Peck movie Big Country...same message, but with the implicit idea that it takes a pair not to fight, too.

    America has lost it's freaking mind over bullying. Amongst men, and boys, teasing is the normal way to arrange a pecking order, and include others in the group. That includes hazing and other things. Admittedly, sometimes those things are ridiculous, and even disgusting, and abusive; I'm not saying it's all good old boy fun and games. But sometimes, it is, and if you can learn how to act within the group, it gets better, and you develop friendship and/or tolerance for each other.

    But my gosh, at some point, a guy has to stand on his hind legs and show where the line is. The law and others can't always do it for you.

    And hopefully, you do it before things are bad enough that you feel the need to shoot someone or blow something up.
     

  3. lklawson

    lklawson Staff Member

    It has been rewarding to watch my son go from a kid who was bullied to a kid who stands up to bullies. It was beyond frustrating to see him come home and admit to being bullied and to have him be told by the authorities that there was nothing he could do about it, to just suck it up, try to be nice to the bullies, and to "tell an adult" (which is worse than useless usually). He's figured out how to stop shy of socking them in the kisser, now, but not just taking it.

    If my experiences are any judge, the next step will be him intervening on the behalf of others being bullied. But we'll see. He's not me and I don't want to try to force him to be.

    Peace favor your sword,
    Kirk
     
  4. talon

    talon the banned wagon

    i agree, kids have become total closet recluse, wussies nowadays. the first sign of even playful teasing and they cry bullying, and the schools and parents and media only make it worse.

    i agree, it often takes more ''balls'' to NOT kick the living crap out of someone that in it does, to just actually do it, and violence is often not the right answer in response to when things do go too far. but, kids do need to toughen up some, get back to reality, shut off the video games, where they are invincible and step back into the real world, where, they do have a place, and its usually NOT on top. 5,

    from a very early age ive taught my kids to not take crap from anyone, be very vocal if someone harrasses you to a point where you are uncomfortable, stand your ground, and as a last resort, get physical. and its worked, they can go round and round with people, they understand that not everyone is going to be thier friend, some people are going to pick on them, and eventually they will have to fight back if the need arises. and they have done that too.

    ''tell a teacher'' does no good. when my son was in kindergarten, he had long hair (as did i at the time) and at recess he got picked on by the older students, he did what he thought was right, and told a teacher, the teacher told him quit being a baby. it progressed, verbal harrassment against him, pushing, to the point someone hurt him. he again went to a teacher who did nothing. he then stood up for himself, told the older kid to stop. he didnt, he told him again much louder. the kid didnt. well, after being pushed around, my son, again in kindergarten and without help from the teacher, had to fight back finally, and punched the kid in the nose, breaking it. (it was a 5th grader). of course, now my son was in trouble and suspended. after a long talk with the principal, he was allowed back and the teacher who ran recess was suspended for two weeks for not doing her job and allowing it to get this far. but i feel my son handled it very well, he tried for a long time to get things to stop the right way before taking matters into his own hands.

    kids do need to be ''bullied'' to a degree to learn about life, it helps in alot of ways, but again there is a breaking point to everything, and they must also learn to stand up and be strong. that could include walking away, it might include fighting back. but, the longer they sit in front of thier XBox and are unstoppable, the moment someone looks at them cross they turn into whimpering puddles of pansy.
     
  5. ajole

    ajole Supporting Member

    34,512
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    I just can't see that, at all.:confused:

    :D
     
  6. tallbump

    tallbump Supporting Member

    "I promised you, dad, not to do the things you've done.
    I walk away from trouble when I can.
    Now please don't think I'm weak, I didn't turn the other cheek,
    And papa, I sure hope you understand:

    Sometimes you gotta fight when you're a man".
     
  7. bullying does not fly at my grandson's elementary school. They do not tolerate it it at all.

    Teacher's aren't stupid, they know if bullying is happening and according to my oldest grandson no one rats anyone out, the teachers take care of it right off. He told me he can't recall much of it happening at all.

    Of course kids are cruel as hell and who knows what happens when kids are out of sight of the adults.
     
  8. Hermitt

    Hermitt Hey! Get Off My Lawn! Member

    Well, my daddy left home when I was three,
    and he didn't leave much to Ma and me,
    just this old guitar and a bottle of booze.
    Now I don't blame him because he run and hid,
    but the meanest thing that he ever did was
    before he left he went and named me Sue.

    Well, he must have thought it was quite a joke,
    and it got lots of laughs from a lot of folks,
    it seems I had to fight my whole life through.
    Some gal would giggle and I'd get red
    and some guy would laugh and I'd bust his head,
    I tell you, life ain't easy for a boy named Sue.

    Well, I grew up quick and I grew up mean.
    My fist got hard and my wits got keen.
    Roamed from town to town to hide my shame,
    but I made me a vow to the moon and the stars,
    I'd search the honky tonks and bars and kill
    that man that gave me that awful name.

    But it was Gatlinburg in mid July and I had
    just hit town and my throat was dry.
    I'd thought i'd stop and have myself a brew.
    At an old saloon in a street of mud
    and at a table dealing stud sat the dirty,
    mangy dog that named me Sue.

    Well, I knew that snake was my own sweet dad
    from a worn-out picture that my mother had
    and I knew the scar on his cheek and his evil eye.
    He was big and bent and gray and old
    and I looked at him and my blood ran cold,
    and I said, "My name is Sue. How do you do?
    Now you're gonna die." Yeah, that's what I told him.

    Well, I hit him right between the eyes and he went down
    but to my surprise he came up with a knife
    and cut off a piece of my ear. But I busted a chair
    right across his teeth. And we crashed through
    the wall and into the street kicking and a-gouging
    in the mud and the blood and the beer.

    I tell you I've fought tougher men but I really can't remember when.
    He kicked like a mule and bit like a crocodile.
    I heard him laughin' and then I heard him cussin',
    he went for his gun and I pulled mine first.
    He stood there looking at me and I saw him smile.

    And he said, "Son, this world is rough and if
    a man's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough
    and I knew I wouldn't be there to help you along.
    So I gave you that name and I said 'Goodbye'.
    I knew you'd have to get tough or die. And it's
    that name that helped to make you strong."

    Yeah, he said, "Now you have just fought one
    helluva fight, and I know you hate me and you've
    got the right to kill me now and I wouldn't blame you
    if you do. But you ought to thank me
    before I die for the gravel in your guts and the spit
    in your eye because I'm the nut that named you Sue."
    Yeah, what could I do? What could I do?

    I got all choked up and I threw down my gun,
    called him pa and he called me a son,
    and I came away with a different point of view
    and I think about him now and then.
    Every time I tried, every time I win and if I
    ever have a son I think I am gonna name him
    Bill or George - anything but Sue.
     
  9. Branth

    Branth Member

    6,275
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    I call bull**** on that one.

    Let's draw a line between "teasing" and "bullying." "Teasing" is normal - Calling kids names, forming petty little cliques, rivalries, etc. "Bullying" is violence. Kids getting beaten, hurt, or physically harassed. That is not okay, and needs to be treated as such. Kids should be taught to stand up for themselves, I agree. I also agree that the school polcies aren't helping, bu hurting - I was pretty ruthlessly bullied in school, and got the crap kicked out of me in middle school. I never started a single fight, but because I was "involved" and wouldn't just lay there passively and get beat on, I got expelled for "fighting."

    Bullying needs to be addressed. It's not going to go away with more zero-tolerance policies or counseling - It's going to go away when you stop punishing the victims for fighting back, and start actually dealing with the troublemakers.
     
  10. SWAGA

    SWAGA No longer broke... Lifetime Supporter

  11. ajole

    ajole Supporting Member

    34,512
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    NE Utah
    That's the absolute truth.
     
  12. ajole

    ajole Supporting Member

    34,512
    10,740
    NE Utah
    This is true. The problem is, its often very hard to determine who is at fault; and in today's society, getting sued is a potential outcome to ANY decision.

    If we stopped the lawsuits, and let the administration do their job without fear of being second guessed or sued, things would be better.

    Of course..today, much of the administration i read about is so far to the left that I have no confidence in their ability to find their way out of a paper bag, much less unwind who is at fault correctly.
     
  13. Bull

    Bull Just a Man Supporting Member


    In my son's case in middle school, the vice principal's kid was the main problem... Typical of small town schools.
     
  14. Unfortunately people make the problem worse by blaming 'bullying' as the root cause of a lot of issues young people have. A few years ago a local teenage boy commited suicide by walking in front of a big rig, it was of course blamed on bullying. All we heard was how the other kids picked on him and ostracized him because he was 'different'.

    My nephew, who isn't the smartest kid in the world, hit the nail on the head when he told me "Uncle Doug, he wasn't bullied, he just didn't want to get along with anyone. He did everything he could to stand out and be different. Whenever other kids were nice to him he told them to piss off and go f_ _ k themselves." I also found out later there were other issues going on at home, let's just say his parents were never in the running for 'Parent of the Year'. But you never heard any of that, just that the poor kid was bullied and killed himself because of it.

    Makes me wonder how many similar cases are mis-reported, I mean it's not like the press is interested in reporting the facts anymore.
     
  15. talon

    talon the banned wagon


    hence the reason is was specifically put in 'quote' 'end quote'. the very term bullying now a days has, like most everything else, been blown completely out of context. now, if you arent friends with a certain kid, you're a bully, if you are in a clique or if you laugh at the goofy kid, etc......way out of proportion. kids are always going to be kids, and will always pick on each other, make fun of each other etc. its normal and natural. yet, by todays standars they are all bullies in one way or another.
     
  16. The same attitude carries over to adults, if you disagree with (insert name of minority politician), you're a racist. If you disagree with gay marriage, it's because you're a homophobe. If you disagree with global warming you're a nut job who's out of touch with reality. And the list goes on. People can't defend their position with reasoning or facts so they call you a name and move on.
     
  17. ajole

    ajole Supporting Member

    34,512
    10,740
    NE Utah
    Or call you a name, and don't move on, daring you to call them out on their own intolerance, so that they can shout you down some more, backed by their own media backed stupidity and army of meme based idiots.:cool:
     
  18. Branth

    Branth Member

    6,275
    4
    My parents asked the principal what needed to be done so I'd stop getting beat up. His answer? "Move."

    Luckily, my parents made enough money that we were able to do so. I went to a decent high school, and the problems stopped instantly.

    It also helped that I had a growth spurt and wasn't the chubby nerd anymore.
     
  19. Bull

    Bull Just a Man Supporting Member


    Amazing how that helps.
     
  20. GoesBang

    GoesBang Supporting Member

    Great body slam action there