get the .40 then. i had a .40 and have a .45, they felt almost identical in size and weight but the .40 ammo is a little cheaper. dont ask me why i sold the .40 and not the .45, i dont think clearly at times lol
I am also a newbee and I went with 9mm 'cause i wanted a pistol and a long arm. I also wanted an inexpensive ammo to develop shooting skills at the range. The 9mm HP carbine 995TS is a pleasure to shoot and looks feirce. I ended up with a 9mm Ruger P95 and a HP C9 Comp pistols.
Then my father-in-law gave me a 1914 Mauser .32 ACP pistol. He took it off a German officer in 1945. The officer was pissed off because after Dad took it off his night stand, he was then woke up and marched downstairs without his pants! lol! A gunsmith stripped, lubed, reassembled and test fired the Mauser pistol. Well worth $50.
Its all personal preference. Nobody can tell you what gun to get except yourself. I will say that I would choose the .40 because of the availability of ammo and the price is a little cheaper. That is only because you have big hands. If you could, I'd still try out the C9 as thats a good reliable gun and ammo is even cheaper and starting to get more readily available. Just my opinion.
That was naughty of your father to not let that officer put his pants on. Now if he was an enlisted man he probably wouldn't have cared.
Go with the .40. Cheaper ammo and at least as much power as the .45.
I originally bought the .45 because it is a low pressure round and I had heard some horror stories of .40 S&W splitting cases in unsupported chambers. Also the brass is more likely to fail after reloading a couple of times.
The Hi-Point uses a fully supported chamber and now I have a .40 to go with my .45 and love it. It is a smooth shooter. The .45 has a little more "whack" to it's recoil.
Either way I would go with a large frame for home defense. My .40 and .45 are more reliable than my C9.