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Your gonna need cardboard, suspenders, a sheet of your choice for color, and a lampshade. Make a 2 1/2 to 3' disk of multiple layers of cardboard. Make a hole in the middle of the cardboard that you can fit in. Attach the suspenders to the inside of the hole. Cut a hole in the sheet to match the cardboard and put this contraption around your waist with the suspenders over your shoulders. Put the lampshade on your head and POOF.... your a one night stand!
 

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Well copy and paste, then you can fix the "issue" so to speak. Well worth it.
 
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