Southern birth control method for those without insurance

Discussion in 'Vintage Topic Archive (Sept - 2009)' started by waltham41, Apr 16, 2008.

  1. After having their 11'th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed.

    So the husband went to his doctor/veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more children. The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem, but that it was expensive.

    A less costly alternative, said the doctor, was to go home, get a cherry bomb (fireworks are legal in Alabama), light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10.

    The Alabamian said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest man in the world, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me."

    "Trust me," said the doctor.

    So the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count: "1, 2, 3, 4, 5," at which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs, and resumed counting on his other hand.

    ** This procedure also works in Tennessee, Arkansas, Virginia, Mississippi and West Virginia. Florida just made the list. ;)
  2. Uraijit

    Uraijit Guest

    Hear it works in Tulsa, and surrounding areas as well. ;)

  3. Strangerous

    Strangerous Member

    That's awful... and probably painful. :lol:
  4. I wouldn't know, Ive been with my lady for almost 20 years, all we have anymore is hallway sex, which is a well known form of safe sex. :lol:
  5. Uraijit

    Uraijit Guest

    Haha! Hallway sex... As long as you're the one initiating it, it can be very rewarding... When you reciprocate, it just leaves you feeling dirty...

    SHOOTER Z Well-Known Member

    I think they use THAT in parts of the Carolinas as well.
  7. How true, how true........, that is why that form of sex is usually planned ahead of time, and is over very quickly. :lol:
  8. Re: Southern birth control method for those without insuranc

    Lol, that was a good one :lol: :lol: :lol:
  9. AndrewST

    AndrewST Guest

    hahaha. that was funny.
  10. gunnut

    gunnut Member

    Kentucky didn't make the list?
  11. Uraijit

    Uraijit Guest

    I'm sure it does, but it's impossible to know, since they would have to be able to write, in order to document it... :lol:

    SHOOTER Z Well-Known Member

    I thought that was about 95% of all those in Utah!! :wink:
  15. I dunno, the only time I had that kind of sex, I am the one that got the screwing :lol: :lol: :lol:

    Its been long enough ago that I can laugh about it now. Yep, I can laugh about it now (sob)
  16. Hallway sex is the natural progression of a relationship. Once that stage is reached, you come to realize that either you're too set in your ways to do anything about it or it just doesn't matter any more.
  17. Uraijit

    Uraijit Guest

    Utahns don't believe in birth control...
  18. That is very true.