Look at this crap I came across..
When we first heard that Steven Seagal was a deputized police officer in New Orleans, we were amused. When we heard someone was going to make a reality series out of it, we were baffled. When the thing actually happened, we were like, "Okay, somebody's messing with us right?" But no, a series titled "Steven Seagal: Lawman" will air starting this December on A&E. There's already been a lawsuit filed against the network by two producers who are seeking credit and compensation, but if we were them we would stay far, far away from this thing, because it just seems like a bad idea. Actor, singer, and martial artist Steven Seagal enforcing the law? Here are a few reasons why this might not work out:
He's Played a Cop Before
In fact, he's played a lot of cops. And if there was an award given out to cops for "most humane" treatment of suspects, Seagal would get the opposite of that award. Most of his movies cast him as a lawman out for revenge for the murder or attempted murder of his friend or partner or family, and he then proceeds to kill or beat up half of whatever city he lives in to find the guy who did it. In "Out for Justice," his captain actually gives him an unmarked car and a shotgun, and turns him loose in New York. Granted, we doubt Seagal is allowed to carry a real gun on the show, but the man can kill with a pool cue, a corkscrew, you name it, which means he's lethal in most bars and a high percentage of rumpus rooms. Do you want someone like that writing you a jaywalking ticket?
Watch a preview of "Steven Seagal: Lawman" here:
He's Not Exactly a Role Model
"Pistol Whipped," "Out for a Kill," "Above the Law," and "Today You Die" are just a few of the names of films Seagal has appeared in. In most of his movies, the bad guy (or one of his henchmen) is a crooked cop -- so not only does he play criminals on occasion, but he has gone above and beyond in his depiction of police officers as being corrupt. How is anyone going to take him seriously when he pulls them over for a busted taillight?
He Will Do Anything for a Buck
Not only does the man have his own line of collectable knives, he also has an energy drink called "Steven Seagal's Lightning Bolt" and an aftershave called "Scent of Action." We're not saying he'll take a bribe, but who's to say that he won't be swayed to cut a suspect a break if he sees an empty bottle of Lightning in the car, or catches a whiff of Action? He's not going to throw a paying customer in the clink. Carrying a concealed knife can be an arrestable offense, but what if it's the Steven Seagal Edition? His signature's on that bad boy, so how can it also be on an arrest report?
The Man is 57 Years Old
The retirement age for police officers can vary. Early retirement with partial benefits is common, and even if it's not taken, many older officers accept the benefits of their experience and take less active jobs around the precinct -- preferably ones that don't require them to drive at night or pursue suspects on foot. At 57, Seagal is probably one of the older men on patrol in Jefferson Parish, and he certainly looks it in the show's trailer, wearing glasses and appearing confused as the driver of his patrol car whips them into a high-speed turn. You have stunt doubles handling your fighting on film, Steven -- are you really that desperate for a little action?
TALK ABOUT IT: Will you watch Seagal's reality show?