So my wife called me yesterday at work. That's literally never happened before. In almost four years of being married, she has never once ever called me at work. My first thought was, "The kid's dead," because that's literally the only reason I would think of that she would call me at work. Well, she tells me she took a spill down the stairs along with the baby, her foot is in so much pain that she can't move, and that my son landed on his head during the fall. So I grab some first aid stuff, jet out of work and rush back home. She said the baby was okay (calm, alert, active), so since it was her foot and her toes weren't turning blue, I told her not to call 999 (Britain's 911). We don't like the UK health system (TRICARE would cover us, but we wanted the base ER). I get home, and I take off her sock; her middle toe is bend waaay up at a weird angle, and the middle part is blue and almost spherical. Looking at it, I thought dislocation at first, but there was a wound there that reminded me of when a buddy of mine busted his finger and the bone popped through before going back in, so I got her and the kid in the car and to the ER. Yup, dislocated. They popped it back in and buddy-taped her toe. They also took a look at the boy, determined he was good; turns out he only fell like a foot and kind of at an angle, so while he had some redness on his head, he didn't have any injuries, so they let him go. But she's gonna have to follow up with orthopedics to make sure the bone isn't damaged. She actually said the pain was worse than childbirth. Of course, this is a woman who's definition of pain is on par with the Texas definition of big. And I got out of work early!