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When we go to a restaurant and we have to wait on a table, I like to give the hostess the name of “Lipschitz". The girls usually are like "Pap, please don’t". O course I don’t listen. I love it (and often wonder how the hostess feels) when she/he callsout. "Lipschitz, party of 6, your table is ready".

Tonight I picked up carry out from the fish house. Jennie told me it was in her name. I arrived asked for the call in, name of Jennie. They could not find the order. One of the waitstaff said, it’s right here. Jennie Lipschitz. Oh....My.... God. Did she just do that to me?

Yes, that’s me. I paid and laughed all the way home!
 

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I usually use Mehoff. First name Jack.
 

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Old joke here, “Lipschitz? What does your asshole do?"
 
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